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Today, someone ask me this question..

“how can we forget a person?”

and this cause me to think abit..

Then 2 questions came to my mind…

Can we really forget someone?

If Yes, have I really forgotten the person?

This started the whole process of pondering..

And I threaded my thoughts together, trace it backwards and forward feeling how I think about how I think and why do I think that way…

And now I shall present my findings here and explain why do I think that way…

Can we really forget someone?

Answer is NO

In fact it’s when you acknowledge the fact that you can never forget this person then, have you truly forget this person

Ironic? Read on!

We can never forget this person we once loved because no matter what, he or she has after all stepped into our life and left a footprint of joy and happiness in our heart.

And this Joy and happiness is something that we can never forget..

I analyzed the procedures of thinking of a person you once love and bench mark every steps. Here I go..

I remembered the person…

I remembered the life we shared together…

A feeling of nostalgicness came…

A feeling of sadness came…

A feeling of relief came…

And move on with life…

Let’s start with the first one…

I remembered the person…

ahh.. a name will ring a bell.. and this person face will appear all over your mind…

I remembered the life we shared together…

How the mind works.. when you remember a person.. what makes this person so special from another person is based on what this person has done and contribute to your life…

Thus… you would remember the things this person does…

A feeling of nostalgicness came…

The happenings are so memorable.. it brings such great taste to your mouth that you just feel like licking it and tasting it one more time.

A feeling of sadness came…

Ahh… as much as I would want to lick it and taste this great fruit once again, It’s too far out for me to reach it..

and naturally.. many people will be stuck here…

This is the step that I have track down to be the hardest to pass by… and this is also the step that started the whole discussion of

Why is it so hard to forget someone..

Many people long to taste this great fruit again.. yet knowing it’s impossible, mixture of feelings comes into place.. unexplainable desperation evolve..

Yearning for it.. YET not knowing what to do and as time past by, it reaches the stage of sigh and more heavy sigh as no more solution went through your brain.. until eventually..

Too much focus was on this issue that depression came.

Everything in the world seems dull, nothing seems as gleeful as it is anymore..

and since you think about this so much, you neglected every other part of life, and you forgot that the world is more then just what you are going through here and this is only one very small part of life, and nothing helps anymore.. and It’s up to yourself to break free from this…

Three words: can’t let go..

If only you can let go of the past and clung on to the future… this step will be a relief for you and you will proceed to the next step…

or else.. you will forever be stuck here.. and unable to go on to the next one which is :

A feeling of relief came…

Why? Simple.. it’s only when you have finally think through about the ways of optimism, BELIEVE IN IT, only then will you be able to MOVE ON and ACT towards your goal of optimism.

Then relief will come…

And move on with life…

then you will place this person aside, and continue doing whatever you are doing when you thought about this person…

And thus complete the whole cycle of truly forgetting someone.

So what does it really mean to forget someone?

In my opinion, the true definition about forgetting someone is when you remember this person, you remembered the happiness this person brings you, accept it as the past, believing in a greater future ahead waiting for you to discover, give a smile to it, and move on…

Some people might argue,

“But I’ve tried doing something else to forget this person, but after so long I suddenly felt I miss this person!”

Well, In my opinion.. you DID NOT overcome your feeling of sadness.. In fact you are still stuck there…

you merely postphoned it to do many other things all in the name of forgetting this person..

but the key is..

you are still focussing on this person!

When you are working on a solution, you are always curious to find out the result. So naturally when your mind goes through the thinking process of evaluating how doing whatever you are doing now has helped you forgotten the person and naturally the analyzing stage I’ve stated above will happen and eventually, the accumulation is too much to bear and the volcano erupted even greater then before…

So My advise to this is this .. DONT do things for the sake of forgetting someone,

but do life just the way life is.

The key: DONT FOCUS On this issue!

Ok let me clarify that what I’ve written here is purely on how I analyzed this whole episode and It’s by no means represent any other person thoughts other then myself.

Everything is debatable and nothing here is absolute.

ANd this marks the end of another analysis by Me

Now time for something relax…

Here’s something I saw from his blog

Why Chinese shouldn’t have Christian names:

Anne Chang(Mandarin)-Dirty
Anne Chin(Mandarin) - Keep quiet
Faye Chen(Mandarin) - Dusty
Carl Cheng(Hokkien) - Buttock
Monica ChengHokkien) - Touching your buttocks
Lucy Leow(Hokkien) - You are dead
Jane Tan(Mandarin) - Frying eggs
Suzie Leow(Hokkien) - Lost till death
Henry Mah(Mandarin) - Hate your mum
Corrine Tai(Hokkien) - Poor fellow
Paul Chan(Mandarin) - Bankrupt
Nelson Tan(Mandarin) - Bird laying eggs
Leslie Tong(Mandarin) - Rubbish bin
Carmen Teng(Hokkien) - Leg hair long
Connie Mah(Cantonese) - Call your mother
Danny See(Hokkien) - Squeeze you to death
Rosie Teng(Hokkien) - Screws and nails
Pete Tsai(Hokkien) - Nose droppings
Macy Koh(Cantonese) - Never die before

And this is also from his blog.

Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
Give honest and sincere appreciation.
Arouse in the other person an eager want.

Six ways to make people like you
Become genuinely interested in other people.
Smile.
Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
Be a good listener.
Encourage others to talk about themselves.
Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely.

- The moonlight bathing over me…